I want to start a Club for members who proudly suck at something and really don't care.
I'm not saying suck at being a surgeon or car mechanic but who cares if you suck at guitar, Spanish or golf. Why? Because many things aren't easy, and you know what, that's okay, because you aren't hurting anyone (well a sideways golf shot could actually hurt someone, so be safe). Golf is a whole lot more than getting good results scoring. It is a life sport and hopefully it calls to you because you might love the feeling of moving a ball long distances or you may love the occasionally sense of Zen you experience over a six foot putt. Whatever it is.... dig in and nurture that love despite how sucky you may be!
As a society we've become more specialized and our attention spans demand gratification "now", whether it's a Google search or a quick meal to be wolfed down. I've heard to learn something it takes about five years of doing it....that's a lot of struggling and that would be the antithesis of instant gratification. I'm afraid technology and our devices is speeding up the decline of us developing personal skills because it takes too long or we're just afraid of looking silly.
There are some activities on our wonderful planet that are just worth pursuing even if you never planned to become a master at it. These pursuits can last a lifetime and along the way bring one great joy, satisfaction, companionship and delight in challenging oneself.
When we were children we fantasized about doing something amazing like being a rock star, being in the Olympics or flying to Mars but we grew up, didn't have the time, money or the talent.
Whatever that childhood dream or new fantasy.... you're going to suck at it in the bginning.....and really you might suck at it for a long time. I will suggest that whatever you're wishing to do get some good coaching since you'll get "less sucky" faster and also realize the real key is being OK with sucking at something and instead enjoy the process of slowly getting better. I know golfers that have basically plateaued shooting in the 100's but they really enjoy playing at golf. And that's cool.
Sucking at something is getting harder especially since social media where you see your "friends" doing amazing things, so we naturally compare ourselves to them and that usually makes us feel inferior. But we forget most people are posting their positive accomplishments not their stumbling and bumbling along the way to proficiency.
Ideally we'll all relax more into looking silly, ridiculous or clutsy because you've given yourself permission since you realize that everybody looks foolish when they are beginning at something. I, by the way, struggle at so many things. I love playing guitar and singing but you probably wouldn't enjoy hearing me sing, at least for long, since I really don't have much of a singing voice. But I really enjoy playing at it and I'll continue doing it because "playing" at singing gives me a good feeling and that's enough for me.
Paradoxically letting go to "play" is hard because we're all caught up in this mindset that play is keeping us from our endless list of serious responsibilities. Society tells us there's just not enough room to be frivolous with our time. Hopefully we can learn a few things from most other cultures about having more free time to spend with family or what-have-you (golf) instead of working crazy amounts of hours.
So now when I meet people at a cocktail party I don't ask what they do? I ask what they suck at? I find that the conversations are richer and more interesting with this lead question. Besides that we're are so much more human and relatable when we share what we suck at!
Golf is easy to suck at. So I encourage you to enjoy your suckiness at golf. Don't get caught up in comparing yourself to others. Chuck looking cool out the window. Tell people proudly, I really suck at golf, but I like playing at it!
So there it is....leave room in your "play" hobbies to make mistakes and explore. There are plenty of places where you can be serious and masterful.
Do whatever it takes to make yourself OK with sucking at golf or whatever other activity brings joy even if you aren't the best at it.
By the way if you like the basic premise of this article the “real McCoy” with great writing is It’s Great to Suck at Something by Karen Rinaldi.
